[ and there sandalphon goes again, pushing izumi away right when they were getting good at this whole thing. izumi is all too aware that the both of them aren't each other's first choice either, so he'd know where the other man is coming from...

but of course, he's having none of that. ]

All this talk about me deserving someone better is complete bull anyway. Anyone who puts up with me is just going to suffer no matter what I do. That's just who I am, and nothing's ever gonna change that.

[ leo and makoto may have gotten over that, but it's still a burden that izumi will have to carry for the rest of his life. maybe it's why he's grown attached to his submissive as time went on - the baggage isn't as heavy. ]

But you... You're stronger than you think, so why the hell are you backing down now? I thought you want me to say that I trust you after that night, because I do. I... really do.

[ and it feels weird, admitting something like that to someone else. give him a moment to gather up his pride anyway. ]

...I've already made up my mind anyway, but all I ask is that you've got to start thinking that you deserve me too. [ he looks away as a feeble attempt to hide his reddening face. ] I didn't want to think that what we have isn't real, not after everything.